I will not be shaken Psalm 16:8

Oh my goodness I had no idea my post would be viewed by over 2,000 people. Two days before I wrote that post I was praying about this blog and I was saying "God, if you have things you want me to write about ill write them. I want to glorify you in all that I do" and then there I was two days later not knowing if  I should stay silent or speak up.

Since Sunday evening my Facebook, phone, and messages have been blowing up with people reaching out to me with similar situations or saying that they needed to read that. I am so incredibly humbled by all this. God took something that destroyed me and turned it into a blessing. Sunday night as I was writing that my heart ached so badly. I kept reminding myself not to write out of anger but simply the truth and what was on my heart. I am thankful Devin gave me permission to blog about it and I'm thankful my husband encouraged me to do so. What a great reminder of  how good of a support system I have right in my own home.

This situation changed me and while I don't believe God wanted me to hurt I believe he wanted me to grow from it . Honestly, In the past I have felt bad for myself or let things bring me down and I just wont allow that to be the case anymore. I want to learn to take any situation and bring good from it. I want my boys to see that people WILL fail us over and over again but God will not. When people use words or actions to put others down it says more about them then it does the person they are putting down. I am not defined by what people say or think about me my identity is in Christ. My worth is found in God, not the opinions of others.

I am feeling refreshed and renewed and know this was a huge heart check for myself. This has lit a new fire in me I want to be the best person I can be.My prayer is that if  I take anything away from this that I will choose what words I will use when speaking about others. I never want someone to feel hurt from words that are spoken from my mouth. Be blessed and  know your support and encouragement means so much.

I've been body shamed

 bod·y sham·ing

noun

noun: body shaming

1. 1. 

   the action or practice of humiliating someone by making mocking or critical comments about their body shape or size.

   
   

   
   

   adjective

adjective: body-shaming

1. 1. 

   expressing mockery or criticism about a person's body shape or size.

This is going to be really hard to share but I feel it needs to be out there. I cannot believe how bad body shaming has gotten. We shame ourselves and others. I don't think people understand how damagaing this can be. When you shame yourself you are believing the lies you are telling yourself but when someone shames you it feels as though they are confirming the lies you have told yourselves. 

Ladies, you are beautiful.. Repeat that over and over... YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!  We are all different shapes and sizes that's what makes us unique. We need to learn to love ourselves where we are at. Why do we feel the need to bring ourselves and each other down? Let me tell you a story that is going to be really hard to share.

I have 3 boys. My oldest is my Step-Son I've lived with him since he was 4 years old so you can imagine I love this boy just as my own. We have developed a great relationship over the past 10 years and I don't treat him any different then my biological children. Anyways, onto my story.  He was with a group of ADULTS... he was the only child in this group and the adults were making fun of me.. they held up a large pair of underwear and said in front of my son. "These would be perfect for Andrea" and then laughed their heads off at me and told him not to tell me.  Pretty funny huh? Let's laugh at a Mother of 3 who is on the job 24/7, let's laugh at a mother who is tying to raise her boys to respect women, let's laugh at this mother who is up all night long with sick kids, let's laugh at this mom who is constantly putting everyone's needs before her own, let's laugh at this mom who makes sure day in and day out that this boy has the best life, let's laugh at this mom who has stepped up to the plate and raised this boy the best way she can, let's laugh at this mom who hardly gets time away from The kids, let's laugh at this mom who goes to bed at night praying tomorrow she is 1% better then the day before , let's laugh at this mom who takes her free time to gain wisdom from moms who have gone before her,  let's laugh at this mom who has PCOS and has a really hard time losing weight no matter how hard she tries. Come on are you laughing yet? 

Why do we do this? Why do we subject children to this? What are they going to think of themselves if we are saying these things about other people or ourselves? I guarantee I can click post and some of you will encourage me, some of you will say "get over it" and some of you will tell me to just lose the weight and people wouldn't have anything to say at all. I'm not trying to glorify obesity or justify it I am just simply saying why do we have to bring eachother down? Why? What good does that do? Why can't we empower one another? Why can't we choose to just love? Just love eachother where they are at. 

I have to be honest here. I have gone through a lot of crap in my lifetime. I've been hurt, back stabbed, abused, and cheated on (no not from my husband so don't go there) but this hurt. I would rather someone punch me in the face and take the physical pain then hear that from the mouth of child.. a child whom I happen to love and have given him everything in my power to have a good and successful life. I don't know what hurt worse.. hearing that personally or knowing he had to hear it? I want him to respect women and others and know that we might not all look the same but we dang well deserve the same respect. How do comments like that teach young men to respect women? 

I can't take it back.. what's  done is done.. I can't go back and change what he has heard about me.. He didn't even want to tell me but I'm glad he did. He doesn't need to carry that. He told me they said it because they are jealous he said it hurt him and he's sorry if it hurt me. I told him it hurt but that's okay. It gave me an opportunity to talk about self respect as well as body shaming. It's a prime example of how a tongue has no bones but is strong enough to break a heart. 

I hope next time you think about talking bad about yourself or others you think twice. I'm just a mom who's tired, has had a long weekend, and a long week ahead of me. I will continue to put one foot in front of the other, love these children likes there's no tomorrow, and persevere through the next thing thrown my way. Be blessed my friends.

New bike

You know when you get to an age where the strangest things make you excited? Like the time we got our dishwasher I legitimately wanted to cry once it was installed because I had been hand washing the dishes for a couple months while we saved up for a new one and not having to do that made me feel like I had less work. Oh the little things in life. 

Anyways, last week Ted surprised me with a new bike and I'm feeling myself all excited again about something as silly as a bike and it reminds me that I'm getting older and totally appreciate different things in this stage of life. I love biking. It's one of those things where I can even go for a 20 minute bike ride and come home feeling like a new women and ready to take on any challenge. It's just amazing how refreshing it is {again one of those super silly things I appreciate now} I am so thankful I have a husband who sees a need or maybe a want in my life and makes it happen. He understands that mama needs a break every now and then or daily. So now I have this super awesome and comfortable bike to ride and go out and clear my mind and take some me time. Remember last week I said I was going to start doing things that I love? Well now I have  my own bike and don't have to steal Ted's anymore! Thanks babe. 

So, the whole point of me writing this is I'm wondering what trails do you like biking on? I would LOVE to find one in east Bloomington where I could ride from my house to the trail but I'm open to all trails around Minnesota. We love to bike as a family as well and wouldn't mind taking some weekend trips. 

Well Hello..

Whoa, it's been 4 years since I last submitted a post. Let's be honest I have totally gotten lost in the daily hustle and bustle of life. I've been doing a lot of self reflecting and thinking. It's time I take back a few things I love to do. It's so easy to get caught up in being a Mom and Wife that I've lost myself a little.. or maybe even a lot. I need to start doing things I LOVE. I love to blog. It's really soothing to me and I love looking back on old posts and seeing where I was at that time in my life. I'm not an expert, I might not have the most entertaining things to write about, and my puntucation sucks but I like it.

Most of you know I'm an open book I don't mind sharing the good, bad, and ugly.  Years ago I thought I had to be "perfect" in order to be a Christian but that thought failed me pretty quickly. I'm not perfect.. in fact I'm far from it. I fail daily but I refuse to give up. I'm just a Jesus follower, Wife, And Mom who's trying to be the best person I can be.

So, my hopes are to keep up on this blog. I don't know how often that will be and you never know what your going to get.