Better days to come

Have you ever just had one of THOSE weeks.. where everything seems to go wrong and you can't catch a break? Well that is us right now but it's been like a month.. it started with a lady hitting my van, then our less then a year old dishwasher broke and we've had 3 appointments for them to fix it.. (it's still broke and I HATE doing dishes by hand), and then we had a water leak from our fridge to our basement so our kitchen flooring is all ripped up from the restoring company and when they pulled 3 layers of tiling off they possibly found asbestos which we will get the results of that tomorrow. Then, the basement grew mold so they came back and cleaned that up and ripped some carpet up. Our fridge is all the way across the kirchen in a new place that makes life so out of place (I can't wait to have the fridge back where it belongs). After a crazy long day I hopped into the shower to only have freezing cold water and to find out our water heater went out.. is this even real life 😂. I would love to tell you that's it but then this morning I got a tap on my shoulder from our 7 year old who said he was having breathing troubles and his lungs felt funny.. so we got up and headed to the hospital. They observed him and said everything was fine THANK YOU JESUS! On our way home from the hospital my husband calls from his work and says it's been a crazy day there and he got a phone call from his full time job and there is sewage spewing all over the place and he need to get there. So off he went and we headed home to relax... but when I opened the door I found more water..... apparently the huge, loud, annoying dehumidifier the company has placed in our house has sprung a leak in the hose and there's water all over again. Oh my gosh you guys at this point I feel like I am ready to have a breakdown and can't take another thing to go wrong. 

I had to take a step back after our 7 year old tells me he's been feeling ignored and wants me to snuggle with him.. it hit me hard I felt so bad that through all of this crazyness that our "normal" has been off. So we put a movie in and crawled into my bed and Jaxton, Brody, and I snuggled. I actually fell asleep and I can't remember he last time I've taken a nap but it was glorious.. even if the kids were being wild and crazy and pulling my hair and opening my eyeballs the nap was exactly what I needed. That 30 minutes felt so rejuvenating and I was able to get up and reset my day. 

As I was driving to pick up our oldest from work I was thinking about how even though we are going through all this our God is so Much bigger then anything we face. I felt so alone today and defeated and I was reminded that my God will never leave or forsake me. I was thinking about all the work that needs to be done on the house now and how when this is all over it will turn out great. I can't choose for these things NOT to happen to us but I can choose how we respond to this. Today I choose to be grateful for a roof over our heads even if  the inside is a hot mess and has orange floors, I am thankful that our Brody is okay and it was nothing serious. We may not be able to control our circumstances but we do get to control our behaviors and when you feel alone and defeated don't lose hope in the lord his plans are bigger then we can see.  I needed a reality check today. I am hopeful for the blessings to come from the chaos. 

I call on the Lord in my distress, and he answers me

Psalm 120:1

Lay it down and don't pick it back up

How many of you are like me and lay something at the feet of Jesus and then just turn around and pick it back up? This is something I keep doing. I am in a season where I am struggling. I know it's a season I won't be here forever but right now I am. It's been about 7 months of a spiritual struggle for me. I've just been trying to find my purpose and figure out how the Lord wants to use me and I just feel a little lost and then not to mention that life is happening so it's hard to find the balance. Anyways, I stumbled across this Pinterest quote that I had saved a long time ago that said "forgive me for picking back up what I've already laid at your feet." Yup, this is me. I lay It down and then pick it back up sometimes all in the same day. 

 I had to really think about this. How does this hurt me to continue this or better yet how does this hurt my relationship with God?  Then I realized what if I did this to my husband or my best friend? What if I said, "hey I trust you with this problem can you help me?" Only to turn around and say nevernind I don't trust you I take that back I don't want your help or advice. Oh man, that thought hit me hard. That is EXACTLY What we do when we decide to lay something at the feet of Jesus and then pick it back up. 

Here's where I struggle. I want the solution NOW. I want the problems to be fixed and the situations to not be situations and everything to work out, but we live in a broken world. Things aren't going to be fixed immediately or sometimes ever and that thought is hard for me to grasp. I don't want my feathers to be ruffled, but what if things always worked out perfect? Would we have faith then? Would we have to be pushed out of our everyday normal and get uncomfortable? I can't answer that forsure but here's what I do know. When have I grown the most as a person? When things were easy? No, my biggest areas of growth in life have been when I was uncomfortable, when I've had to face things I never thought I would, when I've had to sit and be patient and wait on HIS timing. I've had to dig deep, pray, and stand firm on HIS word. Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you, " declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

See I know this. I know God doesn't want any harm for me he only wants the best for my life. Somehow though I still manage at times to think I know what's best for me and I pick something back  up and try to handle it the way I think is best only to be in the same position I started in and have to lay it back down again. Thankfully I serve a God who is forgiving and loves me unconditionally. 

I just wanted to encourage anyone who might be in this right now. Do you trust God? If so then lay down your burdens and truly trust HIM...don't pick them back up! We aren't meant to carry these things. God is so much bigger then anything we face. So, if this is you then you can pray this with me today. 

"Forgive me father for picking back up what I've already laid at your feet" 

Guilty Mama

can we start off by talking about this thing people call sleep? I can't tell you the last time I actually had a good nights sleep. Our 3 year old crawls into our bed EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT. Around 2am the door flys open and I can hear his little feet hitting the wood floor. He jumps into bed, tells his daddy to "scooch over" , and then passes out. Have you ever slept with a toddler? I have dreams I am being mauled by a lion or fighting off wild animals in the jungle because he is everywhere. He's upside down, straight across our pillows, on top of my head, laying on his dad's back, or patting my back saying "sleep tight mama". . We have tried a million times to put him back in his bed but he finds his way back into our room within 30 minutes so we just let him stay because let's be honest it's easier to wake up with a few bruises from his flailing limbs then it is to actually get out of the covers a hundred times and walk to his room. I mean it's 3 am. I can't even think straight let alone carry a child back to his room for the 20th time.

So, after our catastrophe of a night our alarm clock goes off at 5:30 AM and we begin our day. Ted goes to work and some days he works 15 hour days {bless his heart he works SO hard} which leaves no break for me through the day. I start and end my day with our 3 kids and I can be totally exhausted by 9pm. We have 3 boys so the second they are awake my two youngest are wresting on the couch and our oldest is already cranky about the way I said "good morning" to him. By the time they are done eating breakfast I have a new grocery list started since our fridge is cleaned out because boys can eat! I send two off to school and then my toddler stays home with me and I do daycare. I seriously have the best job on the plant And I wouldn't change it for anything but man by bedtime I am pooped and for some reason bed time is always chaotic around here. I have naked butts running around waiting for their pajamas, a teenager who all of the sudden wants to ask a ton of questions so he can stay up later, and 3 kids who are starving to death and won't make it through the night if they all don't have one pickle or a string cheese.. heaven forbid if I let them wither away during their sleep. So this pretty much sums up our days just add a few baseball, soccer, and hockey practices in there and running around like a chicken with its head cut off and that's me summed up into one whole day. Whoa that was exhausting just to type.

I'm a mom who is constantly taking care of kids and everyone else's needs, I am sometimes the only one who hasn't had a chance to use the bathroom or brush my hair and most days I'm okay with that. I've always wanted to be a mom and take care of my kids and be home with them. I love everything about it from the boogery noses to the sleepless nights and all their cute little stories, but one thing I lack is taking time for ME. I feel totally completely guilty about it. If I go see a movie with my friend the whole time I'm thinking about my kids and what needs to be done at home and I feel bad that I'm there when maybe they need me at home. I recently had a really good friend who's also like a mentor to me ask me why I feel this way. I really didn't have an answer for her I really don't know why I feel guilty. My husband is so encouraging and always telling me to take a break and get away. In fact sometimes he just hands me the keys and says just go and do something for you, but I can't go do it without feeling some sort of guilt. Half the time I'm super thankful if I just get to take the long way home from dropping a kiddo off somewhere and I can hear all my own thoughts while the kids watch the same curious George movie that's been in the DVD player in the car. Speaking of which I need to change that soon. I can repeat the whole movie.

This has been really bothering me lately and I've had to do a lot of thinking. Why do we as moms feel so guilty about doing something for us? Is it because we constantly compare ourselves to other moms? Is it because we just feel the need to be in control over everything? I just don't get it.. I dont understand how some of us get to this point where we put everyone else's needs before our own. Also, I'm totally not over here trying to act like I'm supermom or anything I just know I have neglected myself in order to make sure everyone else's needs are met. I hate this feeling. I can't stand that somedays I just need a moment to myself and my husband is basically handing it to me on a silver platter and I won't take it. I say "thanks babe but I just want to hang out with you guys I'm totally fine" um, hello... have you seen me lately??? I don't get a good nights sleep, I wear my hair in a pony tail most days because I want the extra 10 minutes to lay in my bed before starting my day, I live in yoga pants,  the other day I took a 7 minute nap in my driveway before entering the house while our teenager babysat, and I put makeup on just to feel a little better about myself and Devin asked if I had plans to go somewhere.. yes, big plans actually I am going to clean the playroom thanks for asking.

So, my new plan. Take the time for myself. Stop taking on more then I can handle. No I can't volunteer at EVERY Event, join the PTA, host the neighborhood block party, and the latest thing I signed up to do is be the team parent for Devin's baseball team. Ted handled the news so well. Thanks babe sorry I added another thing to my plate.  What's that bible verse? My yoke is easy and my burden is light? God's not asking me to take all this on these are expectations that I've put on myself.

Matthew 11:28
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I totally had to look up the definition of weary.. yes, I am that tired I was like what the heck does weary mean.. oh.. tired, worn out, exhausted... Yes, I am raising my hand I am weary. I am actually double weary if that's even a thing. 

Okay, so I don't want to sit here and complain. I LOVE my life. I have to laugh at our crazyness sometimes, but in all reality I would be lost without it. We are just in a season. We're raising little men and let me tell you it's work but it's the best kind of work. Boys are gross and our dinner topics might not always be table appropriate but I love it. I just need to not feel guilty about taking time for myself. I need to pour into my own cup, my husband needs to pour into his cup, and we need to pour into our cup as a couple. We're working on it. I am working on it. No more guilt feelings. 

I just wanted to write this for all the sleep deprived mommas who are raising kiddos. Whatever that looks like if your a mom who is home with your kids or your a mom who works outside of the home. I feel you momma! You got this. We got this. Take some time for yourself. Remember God isn't asking us to take on the world and he says come to him when your feeling weary and burdened. We can find rest in him alone.

I will not be shaken Psalm 16:8

Oh my goodness I had no idea my post would be viewed by over 2,000 people. Two days before I wrote that post I was praying about this blog and I was saying "God, if you have things you want me to write about ill write them. I want to glorify you in all that I do" and then there I was two days later not knowing if  I should stay silent or speak up.

Since Sunday evening my Facebook, phone, and messages have been blowing up with people reaching out to me with similar situations or saying that they needed to read that. I am so incredibly humbled by all this. God took something that destroyed me and turned it into a blessing. Sunday night as I was writing that my heart ached so badly. I kept reminding myself not to write out of anger but simply the truth and what was on my heart. I am thankful Devin gave me permission to blog about it and I'm thankful my husband encouraged me to do so. What a great reminder of  how good of a support system I have right in my own home.

This situation changed me and while I don't believe God wanted me to hurt I believe he wanted me to grow from it . Honestly, In the past I have felt bad for myself or let things bring me down and I just wont allow that to be the case anymore. I want to learn to take any situation and bring good from it. I want my boys to see that people WILL fail us over and over again but God will not. When people use words or actions to put others down it says more about them then it does the person they are putting down. I am not defined by what people say or think about me my identity is in Christ. My worth is found in God, not the opinions of others.

I am feeling refreshed and renewed and know this was a huge heart check for myself. This has lit a new fire in me I want to be the best person I can be.My prayer is that if  I take anything away from this that I will choose what words I will use when speaking about others. I never want someone to feel hurt from words that are spoken from my mouth. Be blessed and  know your support and encouragement means so much.

I've been body shamed

 bod·y sham·ing

noun

noun: body shaming

1. 1. 

   the action or practice of humiliating someone by making mocking or critical comments about their body shape or size.

   
   

   
   

   adjective

adjective: body-shaming

1. 1. 

   expressing mockery or criticism about a person's body shape or size.

This is going to be really hard to share but I feel it needs to be out there. I cannot believe how bad body shaming has gotten. We shame ourselves and others. I don't think people understand how damagaing this can be. When you shame yourself you are believing the lies you are telling yourself but when someone shames you it feels as though they are confirming the lies you have told yourselves. 

Ladies, you are beautiful.. Repeat that over and over... YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!  We are all different shapes and sizes that's what makes us unique. We need to learn to love ourselves where we are at. Why do we feel the need to bring ourselves and each other down? Let me tell you a story that is going to be really hard to share.

I have 3 boys. My oldest is my Step-Son I've lived with him since he was 4 years old so you can imagine I love this boy just as my own. We have developed a great relationship over the past 10 years and I don't treat him any different then my biological children. Anyways, onto my story.  He was with a group of ADULTS... he was the only child in this group and the adults were making fun of me.. they held up a large pair of underwear and said in front of my son. "These would be perfect for Andrea" and then laughed their heads off at me and told him not to tell me.  Pretty funny huh? Let's laugh at a Mother of 3 who is on the job 24/7, let's laugh at a mother who is tying to raise her boys to respect women, let's laugh at this mother who is up all night long with sick kids, let's laugh at this mom who is constantly putting everyone's needs before her own, let's laugh at this mom who makes sure day in and day out that this boy has the best life, let's laugh at this mom who has stepped up to the plate and raised this boy the best way she can, let's laugh at this mom who hardly gets time away from The kids, let's laugh at this mom who goes to bed at night praying tomorrow she is 1% better then the day before , let's laugh at this mom who takes her free time to gain wisdom from moms who have gone before her,  let's laugh at this mom who has PCOS and has a really hard time losing weight no matter how hard she tries. Come on are you laughing yet? 

Why do we do this? Why do we subject children to this? What are they going to think of themselves if we are saying these things about other people or ourselves? I guarantee I can click post and some of you will encourage me, some of you will say "get over it" and some of you will tell me to just lose the weight and people wouldn't have anything to say at all. I'm not trying to glorify obesity or justify it I am just simply saying why do we have to bring eachother down? Why? What good does that do? Why can't we empower one another? Why can't we choose to just love? Just love eachother where they are at. 

I have to be honest here. I have gone through a lot of crap in my lifetime. I've been hurt, back stabbed, abused, and cheated on (no not from my husband so don't go there) but this hurt. I would rather someone punch me in the face and take the physical pain then hear that from the mouth of child.. a child whom I happen to love and have given him everything in my power to have a good and successful life. I don't know what hurt worse.. hearing that personally or knowing he had to hear it? I want him to respect women and others and know that we might not all look the same but we dang well deserve the same respect. How do comments like that teach young men to respect women? 

I can't take it back.. what's  done is done.. I can't go back and change what he has heard about me.. He didn't even want to tell me but I'm glad he did. He doesn't need to carry that. He told me they said it because they are jealous he said it hurt him and he's sorry if it hurt me. I told him it hurt but that's okay. It gave me an opportunity to talk about self respect as well as body shaming. It's a prime example of how a tongue has no bones but is strong enough to break a heart. 

I hope next time you think about talking bad about yourself or others you think twice. I'm just a mom who's tired, has had a long weekend, and a long week ahead of me. I will continue to put one foot in front of the other, love these children likes there's no tomorrow, and persevere through the next thing thrown my way. Be blessed my friends.

New bike

You know when you get to an age where the strangest things make you excited? Like the time we got our dishwasher I legitimately wanted to cry once it was installed because I had been hand washing the dishes for a couple months while we saved up for a new one and not having to do that made me feel like I had less work. Oh the little things in life. 

Anyways, last week Ted surprised me with a new bike and I'm feeling myself all excited again about something as silly as a bike and it reminds me that I'm getting older and totally appreciate different things in this stage of life. I love biking. It's one of those things where I can even go for a 20 minute bike ride and come home feeling like a new women and ready to take on any challenge. It's just amazing how refreshing it is {again one of those super silly things I appreciate now} I am so thankful I have a husband who sees a need or maybe a want in my life and makes it happen. He understands that mama needs a break every now and then or daily. So now I have this super awesome and comfortable bike to ride and go out and clear my mind and take some me time. Remember last week I said I was going to start doing things that I love? Well now I have  my own bike and don't have to steal Ted's anymore! Thanks babe. 

So, the whole point of me writing this is I'm wondering what trails do you like biking on? I would LOVE to find one in east Bloomington where I could ride from my house to the trail but I'm open to all trails around Minnesota. We love to bike as a family as well and wouldn't mind taking some weekend trips. 

Well Hello..

Whoa, it's been 4 years since I last submitted a post. Let's be honest I have totally gotten lost in the daily hustle and bustle of life. I've been doing a lot of self reflecting and thinking. It's time I take back a few things I love to do. It's so easy to get caught up in being a Mom and Wife that I've lost myself a little.. or maybe even a lot. I need to start doing things I LOVE. I love to blog. It's really soothing to me and I love looking back on old posts and seeing where I was at that time in my life. I'm not an expert, I might not have the most entertaining things to write about, and my puntucation sucks but I like it.

Most of you know I'm an open book I don't mind sharing the good, bad, and ugly.  Years ago I thought I had to be "perfect" in order to be a Christian but that thought failed me pretty quickly. I'm not perfect.. in fact I'm far from it. I fail daily but I refuse to give up. I'm just a Jesus follower, Wife, And Mom who's trying to be the best person I can be.

So, my hopes are to keep up on this blog. I don't know how often that will be and you never know what your going to get. 

First photo shoot!

For Christmas Ted got me my first DSLR camera! Today I played around with it for the first time with Eden and Brody. I'm not looking to do this professional or anything I just want to have fun with it!  I am so excited to take many more pictures but here a are few from today.

This one is so funny.

 

He enjoyed being silly!

 



Dinner time devotionals

I have to say that my favorite time of the day is when I get to sit down at the dinner table with my family. I just love all the great conversations, silly jokes, and family time.

 

About two months ago I bought a daily devotional book for the kids and when I brought it home and started reading it I realized that it was geared towards everyone.. Obviously it was great for the kiddos but I knew Ted and I could benefit from reading it as well. That night we started a new family tradition where one of us reads the devotional of the day from the book out loud and then we talk about it as a family.

 

Seriously, it has completely changed dinner time for us. Ive always loved sitting down as a family but now having God the main focus of our nightly dinner is even better. He is working through our family to help us become closer, better ourselves, and open our eyes to how each other thinks about things. Its truly amazing.

 

Tonight was one of those nights that I believe we will remeber for the rest of our lives. The conversation at the table was so deep and hearing Devin share some of the things he thought and is doing in his life made me so stinkin proud of him! I am so thankful to God for blessing me with more then I could have ever imagined!

 

I love this new tradition we have and I hope Ted and I set a good example for our kids and someday they will pass it along to their familys.

Something fun to share

Since Ted has been working nights I've been kind of lonely at night. Tonight I decided to try out something new just for fun and to pass some time.

 

 Apparently if you write on a coffee cup with permanent marker and cook it in the oven it becomes permanent. I decided to give it a try and it actually worked. After making it I thought what cool gifts they could be. You could make one for a friend or give your kids some permanent markers and a plain coffee mug and let them make a masterpiece.

 

Write on a coffee mug with permanent marker and then cook for 30 minutes at 350 degrees. So simple. Have fun!

 

 

'Tis the season to be thankful

 

I love this time of year its full of family, friends, and festivities. Today, Ted asked me what the date was and for some reason it slipped my mind that its already November! Wow, time sure does go by fast. once I said November 1st it reminded me of thanksgiving and all that I have to be thankful for. I know its still a little early but I just had a urge to write it all down. 

 

 

 

 

1. I am thankful for my relationship with Jesus. Yes, this isn't something new for me but my relationship with him has definitely become stronger this year. When we moved to Bloomington we left our old church because the commute was a little longer then we liked. We continued to search for a new church for over a year and just never found one that had everything we were looking for. During our search I felt lost and a little out of touch. We had heard from numerous people to try the church across the street from our house. I don't know why it took so long, but we eventually tried it out and our first service was the Thanksgiving Eve service. During this past year Ted and I have grown so much and both made a decision to get Baptised. Such an amazing experience to share with the one you love. My relationship with Jesus is the most important thing in my life and I feel like I am truly grabbing a hold of that.

 

2. I am thankful for my Husband. Oh boy, where do I even begin. He is a man of so many wonderful qualities. He always makes sure I know I am loved by him. He works his tail off for our family and that is HUGE .. without him we wouldn't have food on the table and a roof over our head. He is an amazing father with lots of patience. He is a loving husband who has loved me unconditionally through everything pretty and ugly. He is the best listener.. I love how when I'm down and a little bit off track he can tell and always has the best advice - Sometimes he knows me better then I know myself... not all the time only sometimes haha! I am thankful for him each and everyday!

 

3. I am thankful for my kids. Where would I be without those precious boys? Honestly, I cant imagine my life without them.  I recently learned that we need to embrace the season were in and right now I am in a season of taking care of a 'want to be teenager' and a toddler. They both are in separate seasons of there life as well and I get the privilege to guide them along and experience the seasons with them. It's such an amazing feeling to watch them grow and become more independent. I am so thankful for having this opportunity and wouldn't change our fast paced life for anything.. eventually we will be in a different season of life and I want to enjoy this one while it lasts.

 

4. I am thankful for my friends and family. I put friends and family together because my family are my friends and my friends are my family!  I have amazing parents who are so supportive in our lives and always willing to help with anything we need .I have truly been blessed in this department all around! I have the best siblings who are more like best friends. I can count on anyone of them for just about anything and I have a special relationship with each one of them individually. They fill my life with so much love. All of my friends are so wonderful. I have a best friend who I have known since the 6th grade.. she is one of the godmothers to Brody and I am so thankful that she is still part of my life. I could go on and on about all the great friends I have but this year I just feel that my life have been overflowing with wonderful friends both old and new! You are all so important to me.

 

5. I am thankful for my job. I don't think its fair to even call it a job because it doesn't feel like work. Sure, I have my days where I feel tired and worn out but that comes with almost anything in life. I love having a house full of kids that feel like family. I like how I have so much love for each one of them. They make our life super fun! It's so amazing to watch my kids create relationships with the kids I watch. They truly become like family and there isn't anything better then that!

 

I am thankful for so many different things and people in my life but I only have enough time tonight to share my top five. It's such a great time of the year and I just wanted to acknowledge a few things in my life that have brought me true happiness. Bless you all.

 

Also a little side note.. There is only 53 days until christmas!! I need to get shopping...

A little note for Devin

 

 

 

I saw this and it made me think of Devin and Brody. I also instantly started thinking of why this was true.

 

1. When Brody drinks his milk he always says "I'm drinking all my milk so I can get as strong as Devin."

 

2. Brody says, "when I get as big as Devin can I  _________?" (Build lego castles, ride my bike without training wheels, have sleepovers..etc.."

 

3. "Mom, can I pick up dog poop like Devin does?" (one of my favorites)

 

4. "When I get as big as Devin I am going to play soccer like he does."

 

5. "Devin gave me a hug so my owwie is all better."

 

 

 

Devin, I hope you know how special you are. Thanks for being the best Big brother. :)

 

Getting closer and closer to being a teenager...

Today is Devin's 10th Birthday.. Yes, he is out of the single digits and he couldn't be happier. We celebrated his birthday last weekend. Although there is no party today I told him that he could pick his all time favorite meal and I would make it for the family tonight.. He picked Breakfast for dinner! We have a few gifts for him after school and one other surprise. I just love birthdays!

 

Note to Devin:

Devin, where do I even begin.. there are so many great qualities about you. I love that you are a sweet, kind hearted, outgoing, competitive young man.  Yes, I can officially say young man now that your 10 years old. I have so much love for you and that will NEVER change. I have some awesome memories with you. You know one of my favorites is when we decided to take scooters down the huge hill at our old house and Daddy was laughing at us. You were so tough for being only 5 years old and you watched me go first and then you said "okay here I come" and you were flying down the hill and as I watched you get closer and closer to me your hands were wobbling and I knew you weren't going to make it. I remember a panic setting into my whole body.. I didn't know what to do. How was I going to stop you from falling?..  Then CRASH.. You fell to the ground. I ran up to you and daddy came running down the hill. I was so scared you were going to be hurt but you looked up at me with those cute blue eyes and said "I can't rub dirt on this one." You were totally fine and even asked to do it again. Anyways, the whole point to my story is that the panic that was in my stomach that day never goes away. It comes back every time I'm waiting to see you walk of the bus, every time you ride your bike, every time your at the park, every time your sad, hurt, or angry.. The feeling comes from love. I love you so much that I can't stand to see you hurt or sad. Devin, you have showed me so many great things in life but honestly one of the best things is you taught me how to be a mom.. you taught me that I no longer can think of myself first, you taught me unconditional love.. no matter what you do or say I will continue to love you more and more each day. I love that you have a heart for God, you are always so worried about hurting other peoples feelings, you are the most amazing Big brother!. I love you so much kiddo thanks for giving me the best life above and beyond anything I could have ever imagined. So, today we are going to celebrate that you have been on earth for 10 years.. but after today lets slow down on the growing.. :) Xoxo

 

 Sweet little boy.

 This was the day I dressed Devin up as a girl. Ted came home from work and saw him and got mad.. Devin and I still joke about it to Ted. There is better pictures of it.. this was the one he approved for my blog.

 Love how his personality shows in this picture.. He just climbed into bed with is aunt and uncle.

 

Agh.. He grew up way to fast.

God you are higher then any other..

I have to say that every day I am thankful for everything I have been blessed with. Today, I had an overwhelming feeling of thanks more than I normally have.  I am  overjoyed with everything in my life!

I was baking cookies for my husband and his friend for their camping trip this week. As I'm placing them on to the cooling rack I was thinking to myself about how much I truly have, how much God has blessed us with, and how amazing everyone in my life is.. especially my husband. I've had a struggle with what my true calling is and if what I'm doing day after day is what I'm supposed to be doing. Well, it hit me today!  I put the next set of cookies in the oven stopped and looked out the kitchen window to see my handsome little son standing on the swing set with a pretend phone to his ear playing who knows what.. it hit me a little harder.. I then walked into my bedroom to make sure Eden was sleeping safe and sound. As I was walking back to the kitchen my eyes filled with tears. Good tears of course!

I have more then I could have every imagined for myself at 23 years old. I have such a loving husband who loves me for every flaw and imperfection's I have.. he truly loves me through good times and bad. I have 2 handsome boys who have overflowed my life with love and have taught me so much about myself. I have the best job ever.. it showed me that I have so much more love to give. I have so many friends and family that just fill my life with love, care, and fun! What more could I want?!

 

 I truly feel like God spoke to me today at that very moment I believe more then ever that this is where I am supposed to be. It kept hitting me harder and harder as I continued to go about my morning.. these are things that I do and see day after day but it was like my eyes and heart were open to truly see it for what it is. I am blessed to have a husband to bake for, I am blessed to have kids who melt my heart when I watch them play, I am blessed to have a job that I have so much love for! I have all those things plus a loving father in heaven who continues to fill my life here on earth with blessings beyond what I could have ever imagined for myself. I completely put my trust in him.  Truly, I am counting my blessings today....

 

 

 

Baking on a hot day!

     We had the privilege to have my mom here from Florida for 10  11 days.(she missed her flight and we got a whole extra day with her lol) We had lots of fun visiting the zoo, playing outside, going to our church BBQ, the state fair, and just hanging out. Wednesday, it was super hot out which unfortunately kept us indoors for most of the day. We found a couple fun recipes off of Pinterest and decided to give them a try. They both turned out really well and were super fun to make with kids. They were easy recipes with common ingredients. Of course, we had to sample them!

 

The first one we made was:

 

Cake Batter Rice Krispies Recipe

 

 Ingredients:

• 3 Tbsp. butter
• 1 (10 oz.) bag of mini-marshmallows
• 1/3 cup yellow cake mix (the dry cake mix, not prepared into a batter!)
• 5 cups crispy rice cereal
• 1 (1.75 oz.) container of sprinkles

Method:

Melt butter in a large saucepan over low heat and add marshmallows. Stir until they begin to melt, adding in (dry) cake mix one spoonful at a time so its combined. Stir in cereal so it is completely coated with marshmallow mixture. Sprinkle in half of the sprinkles and mix. Press into a baking dish (any size will do) and top with remaining sprinkles. Let sit for about 30 minutes before cutting. I find spraying a knife with nonstick spray helps to cut them.

 

 

Nana and Brody with the finished product

 

We also made 'Peanut butter pretzel bites'

 

Ingredients:

1 cup creamy peanut butter

2 tablespoons softened butter

1/2 cup powdered sugar

3/4 cup brown sugar

Pretzels

1 bag semi-sweet chocolate chips

Directions:

1. Line a baking sheet with wax paper and set aside.
2. In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat peanut butter and butter until combined. Scrape down bowl, add sugars and beat until combined. You should be able to roll the mixture into balls without sticking to your hands. If needed, add more powdered sugar until you reach a consistency that is easy to roll.
3. Roll the mixture into small balls, about 1 teaspoon of mixture for each ball, and place on prepared baking sheet. Sandwich the balls between two pretzels and place in the freezer for 30 minutes.
4. Melt the chocolate in a metal bowl over a pan of lightly simmering water. Stir occasionally until smooth, and remove from heat. Dip each pretzel bite halfway into the melted chocolate and place on the prepared baking sheet. Chill in refrigerator until chocolate is set.

 Helping Auntie Mellie Mix.

 Don't forget to have a taste tester!

 Enjoy!

Clean floors

I don't know about you but, having two kids, two dogs, and a husband my floors can be filthy at the end of the day. I feel like I am washing my floors almost everyday to keep them clean. I've tried almost everything on them from Pine sol to natural products from Melaleuca. I have to say I've been pretty satisfied with everything, but nothing was above and beyond was I was hoping for. So, I went to my good friend pinterest and looked up different ways to clean your floors.

I found out that if you combine Dawn Dish Soap, Vinegar, and Baking Soda apparently it's supposed to work well. Yup! They were right! It has to be by far my favorite and most fun floor cleaner. (I say fun because when you mix the vinegar and baking soda it fizzes up.Whoo hoo... floor cleaner and a science project!!) Anyways, I just wanted to share with everyone else who has to clean there floors as often as I do! Here's the recipe!

Heavy duty floor cleaner recipe:

* 1 cup white vinegar

*  1 tablespoon liquid dish soap

*  1 cup baking soda

*  2 gallons tap water - hot

I first filled up my bucket with the hot water, then added the vinegar, baking soda, and dawn dish soap. I felt like when I added the stuff when the water was running that the dish soap created to many bubbles and then I had a bubble mess on my floor.

Hope this works as good for you as it did for me.. Enjoy!

Here's to 2 years and many more to come....

     Today marks the day that I have been married to my wonderful husband for two years! Our wedding day is still fresh in my mind like it was yesterday It was a beautiful august afternoon at Bethany Lutheran Church in Minneapolis and then we had our reception at the Fort Snelling Ballroom. We were surrounded by about 250+ of our closest friends and family. It was the perfect day to celebrate the first day of the rest of our lives as a married couple.

     I remember it being very hot in the church because there wasn't any air conditioning,  but when I was saying " I Andrea take you Ted.." I remember looking deep into my husbands eyes and knowing that there was a reason that God had placed us in each others paths and it was simply meant to be. I look back and thought I couldn't possibly love him any more at that very moment we were standing before the Lord and all the people we love dearly... my heart was pouring with love, but now that two years have passed I know I will continue to love him more and more as each day passes. A few years ago Ted gave me a bracelet that said 'I love you today, more then yesterday, less then tomorrow - Love Ted' Probably one of my favorite things he has ever given me as a gift because it describes exactly how I feel about him too. Everyday he seems to amaze me with his caring, kind, and loving heart.

     Ted, I remember the very first day I met you like it was yesterday. I remember you working night shifts and you would call me on your breaks at like 3 in the morning and I'd lay there half awake on the phone just to hear your voice for a couple minutes. I still remember our first official date was Go-carting and I beat you in the race ( I know you say you let me win but lets be honest I won that race fair and square!) I remember staying up late to watch the hockey games, I remember when we were standing in the kitchen and I turned around to find you on one knee saying how you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me, I remember finding out I was pregnant and you held me and promised to be the best dad to this little baby, I remember giving birth to Brody and you were so supportive and loving, I remember saying "I do" and marrying my best friend.. all these memories will never fade you have kept all your promises (except the melting pot.. its been 4 years since you said you would take me there) now we can keep looking forward to making many more great memories together as a family. I love when I catch you playing with boys and you don't know I'm watching, I love when we laugh together, I love that you work your butt off to support our family of 4, I love that you make sure I know how much you love me, I love your sense of humor, I love that you can laugh at my clumsy self instead of getting mad at all the things I drop, break, and ruin, I love that you have overcome 7 years of being sober, I love that you have love for the Lord, I love that you are always yourself and never put on an act.. I love so many things about you those were just a few. Thanks for being the man I dreamed about when I was younger, a constant support system, a best friend, a loving father, and thanks for being my husband. I can't wait to keep spending the rest of our lives together, and I am so thankful for you everyday. I will never stop loving you.

Love always,

Your wife xoxo



My not so little baby...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BIG BOY BRODY!!!!

Brody is 3 years old today.. yes, that's right 3! Jeez, I cant even believe how time flys.. I remember when I first laid eyes on him three years ago.

When I first found out I was pregnant with Brody I was so nervous I was only 19 years old and engaged to my now husband. We were not planning on getting pregnant before we were married, but I have to say Brody was the best surprise of my life. I have my husband to thank for being a constant support system through that pregnancy. I have grown so much as a person because of Brody. God sure blessed us with a beautiful son!

Brody is my strong willed, wild, crazy, silly, funny, stubborn, and loving little child. He has a heart for god at 3 years old. Being able to witness him 'growing up' is one of the best rewards. I love watching him interact with his brother and he recently started this thing were he wants to do and say EVERYTHING Devin does. It's cute for me and probably super annoying for Devin! Brody is always making us laugh at all the silly things he does.

Note for Brody:

Brody, I can remember the feeling I had in my heart the first time I saw you. You were so little and I knew at that moment that I would do everything in my power to raise you as a healthy, kind, god loving child. Everyday you seem to amaze me... From the first time you smiled, walked, and said 'mama.' Today you are 3 years old and I cant believe it. You have changed my life in a way that I can't even find the right words to describe it.. all I know is you made me a better person. My heart will never stop loving you and I hope you never change who are. I hope that you continue to love god, keep wanting to learn, and being the silly little guy you are.  I love when you come up and randomly kiss me and say "wuv you mommy"... I love that you can't say your 'L's' quite yet... and you sing the alphabet and twinkle twinkle combined in one song. You are truly amazing and I am so lucky to call you my son. I promise to love and support you in life. I love you my blue eyed little boy -never ever forget that. Love always..Mommy. xoxo

Out Numbered

I have to say I love my kids and husband so much, but quite frankly I am outnumbered by boys! There are days that I love it and days that I wish at least someone understood a woman thinking's.

Here is the Biggest problem that I have. I constantly think bright and pink and honestly that doesn't fly here. I once bought a pink polka dot comforter and put in our bed.. Devin laughed so hard that "Dad was sleeping with a pink blanket"eventually I lost the battle and Ted replaced it. Also, every time were all getting ready to go I'm the last one getting ready and there all sitting on the couch nagging me to hurry up. Not only don't they understand that it takes ladies a little longer to get ready they also have no idea about half the things I own. Brody had some bath crayons that were sitting on the counter in the bathroom and I heard ted yell out "Don't touch those Brody they are Mommy's hair curlers and you don't want to ruin them." What the heck? I don't even own hair curlers..

They best things about being out numbered is I get lots of hugs and cuddles from the boys. I get to be the one who holds them when they are hurt or sad. I get to teach the boys so many things that I hope one day a women will be proud to have them as her husband because they can do the laundry and even know moms special secret to getting the grass stains out, they can also cook, and clean. Don't get me wrong here they have PLENTY of time do to boy things such as playing in the dirt, bringing bugs home, throwing balls at the wall, and roughhousing.. these are all things that I have to get used to being a women, but I try to enjoy as much of it as possible!

All together It sounds awful but we have more turned it into a joke then anything they kindly tease me about silly things that we can all giggle at, but at the end of the day I am also very thankful for each and everyone of them, and its also very nice to be appreciated for my 'unboyish' qualities that I feel stick out a little more because I am the only Female in the house.  The other day Devin said "your new purse is so fancy I like it." I didn't tell him that it was Eden's Diaper bag I just enjoyed the fact that he noticed.

 I guess they kind of look like hair curlers..

Love them.

Today is going to be a good day..

 I was sleeping and I heard the back door slam so immediately I jumped out of bed and went to see what was going on. I find Brody sitting on the kitchen floor with a huge smile " morning mama" Once I realized that he had let the dogs out and they were wondering the driveway I thought to myself ......"crap I am going to have to chase these dogs around the neighborhood I'm my pajamas." Good news is the neighbors didn't get an entertaining show and both dogs ran right into the back yard and I closed the gate. Whew.. At this point I was a little upset with Brody. What was he thinking waking up and letting the dogs out all by himself??

I told Brody that it was not okay to do that and he needs to wake mommy up before he does anything in the morning. (typically I am up before the kids. I guess he just wanted to be an early bird) He said " I help you with all your work momma." Which brought me back to our conversation last night. We were telling the boys how they need to be helpful around the house. Even though it was wrong of him to go outside with out telling anyone I am thankful that he wanted to help out and he was listening to our 'talk' last night.

Well, Its now 8 am and the dishes are done, my kitchen is cleaned, and laundry is well on its way to being complete! I can tell today is going to be a good day. Lets hope I'm not regretting saying this around noon. :)